It’s almost Valentines Day! Yayyy and ughh. I am happily married but Valentines day seems to always cause an issue. My gift is late, or non-existent. We get late for dinner reservations because of work. The babysitter didn’t show up, or Divs is extra cranky. I tell myself to just be grateful to have these problems because it means I am blessed.
I also have a lot of single friends, and I know the holiday is extra annoying. It makes them feel like they are incomplete. And don’t get me started on the commercials. The commercials annoy me! How can it not annoy someone single? Hallmark did a great job in alienating half the population.
Enter, China. College students in China started “Singles Day” celebrated 11/11, because the number one signifies unmarried people. This was created to celebrate, yes you read that right, CELEBRATE, being single. It has turned into one the biggest shopping days in the world! I hate that if a woman is single, society looks down on her, despite her achievements. I feel like China’s youth has helped change a common worldwide stigma, and I love it!
So what are some other things us women can do to make sure we reverse stigmas and treat ourselves well?
- SURROUND yourself by women that lift you up. Unfortunately, this can be harder than it seems. If you don’t have your girl group, don’t fret. Join organizations like meetup.com, or try going to classes that you enjoy, like yoga or pottery classes. You will meet others that enjoy doing the same thing you do, and widen your social circle. Don’t say no to hanging out, even if you don’t feel like it. Accept social invitations and tell yourself you’re doing this to find your girl group. It is worth it!
2. EVALUATE your life. Are you happy with your job? You likely spend the majority of your time at your job, so make sure you like where you work. Are you happy with your parter? Your relationship status? You might be wondering what this has to do with treating yourself well? It has everything to do with it! If you respect yourself to know that you deserve to be happy, then you will work towards that goal. Those that don’t think they deserve to be happy feel stuck.
3. MAKE a list of qualities you love about yourself. Include a list of traits you could improve on. It sounds sappy, but self- reflection is crucial to making sure you are who you want to be. For example, I know I need to work on my patience. Luckily, Divya tries my patience on a daily basis and I am proud to say I think I am more patient now. I definitely still need to work on it, but we are always a work in progress.
4. LEARN to love yourself. I get it. You hate your nose. Or you love it, but hate your family. We all have parts of ourselves that we would rather not have to deal with. But life is dealing with things you don’t want to. I don’t mean this in a rude way, more in realistic way. The sooner we accept that, the better. But, we should love ourselves to know that we deserve the best in the present and future. Knowing and understanding that you deserve to be happy means that you have to love yourself.
So make yourself your Valentine this year. Happy Valentines Day!
This picture is of my girl tribe – my sisters!